Have you ever had a relationship where you liked the other person more than they liked you? Hmm, maybe I should reword that: How many times have you been in a relationship where you liked the other person more? And a related question: How many times have you been in a friendship where the other person favored his/her other friends over you?
I’ve had such a friendship for about 15 years. This woman is a good soul and I love her dearly, but this past week I took a big step in releasing her.
For years, she and I frequented Tandoor, talking, sharing secrets, and laughing until we cried. We both had lunch cards back in those days. However, as new commitments arose in her life, I was squeezed out as she spent her shrinking availability with friends she valued more.
As a joke (and a way to get her to spend time with me), I started holding her card. That was 4 years ago.
Knowing that the best time to see her is in the summer, and only if I initiate it, I debated calling her many times over the past 3 months. She’s pure delight, so we would have a lot of fun, but I couldn’t pick up the phone. Nor could I recycle or use the card on myself.
On Tuesday I finally realized I was stuck, with the card being a shackle of sorts.
So when I went to Tandoor Tuesday, I used the card on myself. I had mixed feelings, but mostly freedom because I had released her.
Hmm, that needs to be reworded too: I released myself.